Today might be a morning of philosophical tirades….

It was one of those crisp autumn mornings here in Chicagoland: Sure the sun was out at 6:15am, but it was a chilly September dawn and it was terribly difficult to roll out of bed and hop into the shower. Even worse are my son’s neurotic issues with socks. Getting him ready for school is in itself a challenge: Not only does he have to wear his socks inside out; they need to be a specific brand (the ones with the gold arrows on them!). There is a pile of other socks in his drawer (some new and ready for service) that do not meet approval and soon I am late to work because I am on a sock crusade looking for a match so he can move on to chocolate chip Eggo waffle mode. I will not even get into detail of how long it actually takes for him to put on a pair of socks – excruciating is the only word that comes to mind.

Today is picture day in the 4th grade and last night I was clearly instructed by the wife (the better half) to take my son for a haircut. Well, actually she requested this last week and I squandered the entire Labor Day weekend enjoying the last scraps of summer. So, last night after work we stopped into Great Clips to get the deed done. Of course, being that it is picture day the following day, other parents were scrambling to make their children somewhat presentable for the big photo shoot. I do not know about you, but I have a real problem waiting in Great Clips. There are unruly, snot sniffling kids running amuck in the waiting area, the stench of hair products and there is something about watching other people get groomed that does not resonate well with me.  Now I know where my son gets his sock issues from. After being told there was a 45 minute wait, I made an about-face and aborted mission. Fast forward about an hour and the bathroom floor in my house is blanketed with my son’s buzzed hair. Talk about taking matters into your own hands! That is about the time my wife walked in with her mouth agape. Shock and awe best describes that scene.

Back to this morning… Once we settled the sock issue, next was the pants debacle. My son will not wear jeans unless he is threatened. Being that I am not one to inflict more emotional damage in one day, I let the jeans issue pass – but, there is a caveat to the morning dressing dilemma: there are no clean pants other than jeans! At this point I am ready to pop a Xanax and throw back a martini. Then I paused because clearly I am well outside the radius of my center.  Writing blogs about Energy Vortexes, the beauty of nature, enlightenment and being mindful is one thing, practicing what you preach is a whole other deal. After a couple deep breaths, I found my center and then laughed out loud. Instead of feeling stressed out, I was amused by the comedy of the moment – shaved heads, socks and insanity before school. Nothing makes things better than hugging your kid and laughing about a completely neurotic morning before picture day. I just hope he smiles when the flash goes off.

John C. Bader

 

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